You’re Screwed If You Can’t Manage This One Thing
The Amplified Impact Podcast
January 5th, 2023
You are screwed if you can’t do this one thing… self management.
But, what do you do when your brain is actively working against you?
Today, Anthony shares his struggles navigating his biology, specifically managing his ADHD.
He opens up about his experiences with taking medication and the negative side effects that they had on both his body and mind, and how he ultimately learned self-management.
Through his personal journey, Anthony offers insight and advice about learning to be in charge of ourselves in order to truly thrive.
TWEETABLE QUOTE:
“If you can’t master yourself, if you can’t discipline yourself, then one nobody will… or worse someone will have to.” – Anthony Vicino
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LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anthonyvicino/
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Episode Transcript:
Leading Oneself
Anthony: [00:00:00] Hey, what’s up everybody? Welcome back to another episode of Amplified Impact pom pom pom. Enter dramatic music. Today we are, as we have been for the last 13 or 14 days now, continuing with our lessons learned from 2021, reviewing and unpacking some of the seminal lessons that were top of mind. Most impactful.
Anthony: Most influential on my life as I navigated 2021. And, if you’re new, if you’re not, if you’ve never listened to one of these episodes before, I recommend going back to the beginning. First two episodes of the series, I just lay out the top 21 lessons from, , bird’s Eye View. And now we’re just diving one by one into each one of those lessons.
Anthony: And I think we are on, if my calculations are accurate, which they rarely are, because I’m not a math. Actually, you know what? That’s a limiting belief. Scratch that. I am a math dude. Actually I’m not. I’m a person who can do math. I don’t enjoy math, but when [00:01:00] I put my time and attention into it, I can do it.
Anthony: so there you go. Breaking limiting beliefs in real time on the podcast. That’s what you’re here for, right? Maybe not. Anyways, to date, we’re going to be unpacking an interesting lesson that took me, God, 30 plus years to unpack and really figure out. So if you know my story, let’s just rewind for a second.
Anthony: For those who don’t know who I am, I’m Anthony Vicino. I’m a bestselling author, a serial entrepreneur and Real Estate Investor with Over God. What have we got? $45 million of assets under Management at this point. But the thing is like that’s to highlight reel. That sounds really cool and sexy and like, wow, this guy’s a badass.
Anthony: He’s done some things right? Not to toot my own horn. Just objectively, you’d look at it and be like, okay, you got some achievements you can point to. That’s cool. But the problem was like the, the highlight reel, the bio doesn’t really talk about a lot of the things that went wrong along the way. Didn’t talk about the struggles or the journeys that we lead with our big wins, but we kind of hide our losses.
Anthony: And the, [00:02:00] one of the biggest losses, or one of the biggest struggles in my life was navigating my biology. So I have ADHD, which, was a real, it was a real struggle, guys. Like when O was six years old, I went on Ritalin, which is a drug that helps you get into this, you know, kind of controlled state of mind and focus.
Anthony: And I was on that until I was 16. And it wasn’t until many years later that I, that I put together and realized, when I was getting my degree in psychology, that I was actually having an adverse reaction to Ritalin. and that What was happening inside my body wasn’t entirely normal. I was experiencing kind of like a ramped up side effect of Ritalin, which made me, it made me feel trapped inside my body.
Anthony: It like made me feel confined and drained of energy, just constant malaise. Like I was living in a, kind of like a depressed cloud all the time. Everything was muted. And, I just thought that was what Ritalin was. I [00:03:00] didn’t realize like my experience with that might have been a little bit more amplified than other people’s.
Anthony: but when I was 16, I was given the choice of going off the drug and I said, yes, I’d under no circumstances will I ever do that again. because for me, freedom is my highest value and I wanted to feel in control of my body and my mind. I didn’t want to feel prisoner to that. But the problem was I was this 16 year old kid who didn’t have any of the skills or the habits to routines that would allow me to like, Thrive in the world, right?
Anthony: And so I was trading like feeling prisoner to a drug, to suddenly feeling prisoner to my infinite potentiality, which when I talk to a lot of young people or people who have experienced like a similar background to me, they go, oh my God, yes, I resonate with this. Where you have so much potential, you have infinite choices of in front of you.
Anthony: You could go in in one of a thousand directions and you have so much motion, but no traction, no momentum. and you feel so frustrated [00:04:00] constantly because you know you have this potential inside of you that you’re just not able to tap into and like get the wheels on the ground to translate that motion into, you know, forward progress.
Anthony: And I spent. From when I was 16, probably until my late twenties, maybe early thirties, really struggling now with the fact that I no longer had this external master, this discipline of like the drug focusing me, or like going into a corporate environment, having bosses or having a superior telling you what to do.
Anthony: Like I just inherently rebelled against that and could not find the mental place where I could show up and do work for other people, like I just reject external accountability and authority. And then it took me a long time to figure out that I needed to be that external authority, or rather the internal authority that was going to discipline myself.
Anthony: because if you can’t [00:05:00] master yourself, if you can’t discipline yourself, then one nobody will, or two, somebody else will have to right in, in my case, nobody else will because I wouldn’t let them. In a lot of other people’s cases, they’ll let other people do it for them, like their significant other, their parents, their boss.
Anthony: They’ll abdicate, responsibilty for disciplining themselves, and now they have an external master and they’re slave to that thing. They’re slave to that w2. They’re slave to that relationship. For me, I knew I was never going to be slaved to that, but I was a slave in another way, which was I couldn’t control myself.
Anthony: Right? So it took me a long time to unpack the fact that discipline equals freedom, and that if I wanted to unpack my potential, it was going to come on the back of discipline in creating systems that would allow me to tap into my, my greatness. And so today’s lesson, this is a long preamble, but today’s lesson is that the most important skill to master is the ability [00:06:00] to lead oneself.
Anthony: This is a message that kind of, I think it comes from Peter Drucker in his book, managing Oneself. I also, I asked a bunch of friends at the end of 2021 for what was their biggest lesson learned in 2021. and my buddy Wyatt, who I coach in real estate investing, he, he came back with this one and I was like, man, that is such a good reminder, that the most important skill is the ability to lead oneself.
Anthony: Like before you can lead an organization of other people, before you can lead your family, before you can lead your community. Like you have to be able to lead, motivate, discipline, manage yourself, and if you can’t manage yourself in getting out of bed when you said you would do it or doing the things that you said you would do, and following up and getting the work
Anthony: Done and holding yourself accountable. If you can’t do that, then you can’t, can’t hold anybody else to that standard, you can’t lead anybody else until you can lead yourself. So that’s today’s lesson. I [00:07:00] hope. I hope somebody out there that needed to hear this is hearing it for the first time and they’re going, oh my God, this is everything.
Anthony: This is going to change my life. And. More likely. You’re probably hearing this and thinking, yeah, I know this. but hopefully it hits you just maybe just a little bit differently today and it can serve as the pivot point where you can start implementing this. If you find some areas of your life where you’re not leading yourself up to the standard that you would like, maybe this can be the catalyst for that change.
Anthony: So I hope, I pray, that you got some value out of this. If not, then this was just a wasted Eight minutes of your life. That’s okay. Not a huge time investment, but we’ll try again tomorrow. If you did get some value out of it and you think you’d know somebody else in your life that would also benefit from hearing this message, then do me a favor, go share this with them, and before you boogie out of here, go drop a review.
Anthony: All right. That’s all I got for you guys. I’ll see you tomorrow.
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