They Aren’t Thinking About You
The Amplified Impact Podcast
October 3rd, 2023
Have you ever tripped in public, and then looked around to see if anybody saw it? …Yeah, me neither.
Today, I want to talk about the opinions of others, failure, and progress.
1️⃣ Don’t let the opinions of others hold you back: Many people are afraid to put themselves out there because they worry about the judgments of strangers. But remember, their opinions don’t define you or your journey. The only opinion that truly matters is the one you have of yourself.
2️⃣ Embrace failure and looking foolish: Building something meaningful and impactful requires taking risks and sometimes failing. It’s important to be comfortable with the idea of failure and not let the fear of looking foolish hold you back. Great achievements often stem from numerous attempts and learning from mistakes.
3️⃣ Focus on your own progress, not on what others think: As you move forward on your path of success, remember that those who are ahead of you aren’t thinking about you. The only people trying to tear you down are the ones who are behind you. Keep pushing forward, stay focused, and never let the negativity of others derail your journey.
TWEETABLE QUOTE:
“On the one hand people are okay with us tearing ourselves down but they’re not okay with us building ourselves up. And if you want to succeed in life you need to be able to flip that narrative and recognize that it does not matter what other people think of you.”- Anthony Vicino
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Episode Transcript:
Anthony Vicino:
You. Hey, real quick guys, you already know I don’t run any ads on this because I want to keep it like a really awesome listening experience for you. But I do have an ask. I’d love it if you could just help me spread the word so we can help more entrepreneurs, creatives and high performers, just make more money with less stress and more fulfillment. So the best way that you can help me do that is by reading, reviewing and sharing this podcast. Like the single thing I ask of you is please just take 10 seconds, drop a review. Seriously. It would mean the world to me and more importantly, it may just help change somebody’s lives.
Anthony Vicino:
So thank you and let’s get to the show. So if you spend enough time building your business or putting out content on the internet, which I hope all of you guys are doing because I think it is the coolest, best thing, best way to build a life for yourself. But if you do this, you need to be prepared for the inevitable. Trolls and haters people who are going to come out of the woodworks and try and tear you down. It’s inevitable. A lot of people are generally unhappy with their life and who they are and seeing you try to crawl out of the bucket makes them feel the urge to reach up, try to drag you back down. Now, I generally don’t recommend that you give the trolls any time and or attention because they’re not worth it. There’s this famous line that when the dog barks at the moon, nobody notices, but when the moon barks at the dog, the dog becomes famous.
Anthony Vicino:
And it’s the same with trolls. Like when you just ignore them because they’re sad, they’re lonely, they’re trying to get attention and they’re lashing out, they’re hurt and this is their way of making meaning out of their suffering. If you just ignore them and let them wallow in obscurity, then they’re going to go away. At least they’re not going to get worse, you’re not going to stoke the flames. And I wanted to do this episode today because you will, as you become more and more successful, become a target for people trying to tear you down. And I think you do need to have some kind of coping mechanism because it can suck. We all already struggle with impostor syndrome, every single one of us, regardless of where you are on the journey. The funny part is that it’s culturally acceptable for us to be our own worst critic.
Anthony Vicino:
Everybody accepts that like, oh, I’m my own worst critic or my own worst enemy. Nobody is as harsh as I am on me. And yet people look a scance at us when we tell them like, oh, I’m my own biggest cheerleader. Like when we preen and pop ourselves up and say, I can do this, I believe in myself. And we put ourselves out there on the stage. People suddenly go OOH, that’s not okay. You are cocky, you have no humility and all this stuff, right? So on the one hand people are okay with us tearing ourselves down but they’re not okay with us building ourselves up. And if you want to succeed in life you need to be able to flip that narrative and recognize that it does not matter what other people think of you.
Anthony Vicino:
The only opinion that ultimately matters is the one that you have of yourself. And I noticed that a lot of people are held back from creating content or building their businesses in public because they’re afraid of the judgments that are going to come not even necessarily from their friends and family, but that’s a big one. But they’re more concerned about the opinions of strangers who don’t even care about them in the first place. People who don’t even know about them. It’s like we’re letting the opinions of people we don’t know, we don’t like, we don’t care about affect our decisions and stop us from being able to pursue our dreams. And I just think that’s such a shame. And if we as a group because again we all struggle with this, if we let the trolls win, then we are all just going to be so much worse off because you can’t live in a world where everybody consumes and tears down. That’s not a world worth living.
Anthony Vicino:
We need builders, we need creators. People who are willing to put their work out there, to go out there and create something new. And they’re willing to run the risk of failure and look like a fool because they tried to do something that they had never done before. And of course it’s only reasonable that you would fail. Why would you expect yourself to succeed on the first try or second try, third try? It took you 1000 tries to figure out how to walk as a child, right? It is no different with anything else that you’re going to do in life and especially the things that have meaning and value and that are going to generally move the human population forward or at least move you closer towards your greatness. Those things are going to require failure and looking stupid. And if you’re not okay with that then you’re never going to be able to achieve your dreams. And I want to do this episode today because something I’ve come to realize in life is that the people ahead of you on this journey, they’re not thinking about you.
Anthony Vicino:
They’re not worried about you. They’re not the ones that are trying to tear you down. They’re probably thinking about the people ahead of them or they’re probably thinking about themselves, right? If they’re further ahead on the trail they’re not stopping and turning around to look at you. The only people who are trying to tear you down are the ones who are nipping at your heels. They are by definition, the ones who are behind you. And you have the choice to ignore them, to not acknowledge them, and just keep moving forward on your path towards building whatever the thing is that you’re going to build. Because they can only stop you if you let them stop you. Otherwise they have no power.
Anthony Vicino:
And I want to share that because this is, again, something you will need to come up with. A troll coping mechanism. As you grow and you become more and more a bigger target for people’s negativity and hate, it’s going to happen. You just need to prepare for it because you can’t please everybody, nor would you want to, because I don’t want Nazis to like me, for instance. Right? Like, the idea of everybody liking you is a ridiculous concept because it’s like there are plenty of people out there who you don’t want to like you. Rick and Morty is one of my favorite cartoons. And Rick says something at one point. He goes, your booze mean nothing to me because I’ve seen what you cheer.
Anthony Vicino:
I think it’s one of the greatest lines ever. Your booze mean nothing to me because I’ve seen what you cheer. And so just take that approach with the trolls as well and recognize that you’re going to alienate people. And so hopefully this helps you on your journey because it can be long, it can be lonely, and sometimes it can feel like you’re wasting your time and your energy. But I assure you, the act of creation is never wasted. So keep moving forward. Keep doing. You, I appreciate you for being your shining beacon of light in this world and don’t stop shining.
Anthony Vicino:
So it’s going to do it for me, guys. Catch you back around these parts tomorrow. Until then, stay hyper focused, my friends. Hey, guys. I love, love that you’re listening to the podcast. I truly hope it’s bringing you just a ton of value. But if you ever wanted to check out the video version of these podcasts, then you should head over to YouTube. They’re going to have more effects, more visual stuff like that, and that can help the message sometimes just hit a little bit different and reinforce the lesson in a better way.
Anthony Vicino:
So you can check that out. It’s completely free. Go over to YouTube, search for Anthony Vasino, it’ll pop up. And if that’s not what you’re into, then cool. Just enjoy the show and let’s get to it.
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